Hello! I’m still here, despite all evidence to the contrary.
I feel like this blog has been gathering dust in recent months – there are reasons (excuses?), but those of you on my social media will be aware, and I don’t think anyone else is too bothered. Suffice to say, here I am again.
This year has been both busy and bare. There’s somehow Things going on, while I’m simultaneously getting through each day as it comes. Some are better than others.
Another strange dichotomy/paradox/oxymoron is that I’ve been feeling both disconnected from my spirituality and yet slipping deeper at odd moments. I’ve been called upon for new rituals that’ve required learning and perspective. I’ve had to step aside from some commitments – HAD to, because I physically can’t (and nobody is more sorry about that than me). My dream-life has been both stressful and revelatory – I was visiting Stonehenge again last night, looking at the stars.
I think I’m trying to manage the everyday so much that little liminal moments are finding a way to slip into my head unexpectedly. A random idea, noticing synchronicity, repeated coincidences… those taps on the shoulder to ‘Oi! Pay attention!’
I’m honesty not quite sure where things are leading right now. The world is still mad, but in need – and so am I, to some extent. What I used to do before isn’t what is needed now, because there’s so many others who can do those things. So what am I doing?
I think I’m heading down a different hole, one with no rabbits but something much darker. I suspect/hope that my past experiences will have been preparing for that; who knows?
Suffice to say, the labels are ever more disengaged from the reality for me. Druid, witch, shaman, even duala – I don’t know. I fit all and none. Life isn’t clear right now.
Perhaps we’re entering a time where carving new roles is what’s needed. Power in terms of spiritual strength, combined with awareness that this doesn’t mean muscles but survival, determination and care, empathy while holding boundaries and space.
The past is a learning place, but as recent years have shown, we are constantly stepping into new worlds with new requirements. Some days, I can rise to that challenge; others either not so much or in different ways (that require less spoons). Priorities have changed.
As always, I try to do my best – something that changes from day to day – and continue to be here.
Much love.
The Catbox 
Aurora J Stone said
So very true. So much change – new callings, new paths to follow or new trails to leave for others. Labels are handy, but they can be limiting. Sometimes it makes it easier for others to get a bit of where one is coming from, or going to. Keep honouring your journey as you have the strength and fortitude, wisdom and gentleness to do so.
Nimue Brown said
Back in March, Niall, (who you might know) guided me through the art of deep descent and absolute breaking. It was very hard stuff, and hard not to resist it, but I took his advice and tried to go all the way to the bottom of it. What I found there was ancestral wounding, that had underpinned a lot of other things. Resurfacing with that knowledge I was able to get further help and support figuring out how to not be held by that any more. Somewhere, down in the depths is the demon that has it’s teeth in you, and once you can name it and drag it into the daylight, you can change things.
DK Green (aka DKLeather) said
I don’t often comment, but I do read. Love to you, I very much echo this re-shaping of self understanding. We really must have that coffee..